Understanding children’s mental health: signs and support

Every child has their moments of joy and challenge. While parents know when to step in if a child has a fever or a cough, spotting mental health struggles isn’t always as straightforward. 

Although mental health challenges are common, affecting around one in five children and young people in the UK, it can be hard to tell whether certain behaviours are just a phase or something to seek further support with. 

Many parents feel unsure about what to do. Should they wait, try to help at home, or reach out for professional guidance? 

Understanding children’s mental health is the first step. Then, recognising early signs and intervening appropriately can make a big difference in helping children feel safe and supported both at home and in their daily environments.

What is childhood mental health?

Childhood mental health is a child’s emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects how they think, feel, behave, and relate to others.

When a child faces mental health challenges, it can impact many parts of their lives and how well they do at nurseries and schools.

Children can show signs of mental health conditions from a young age, but official diagnoses typically begin around age 2 to 3 years for developmental disorders (such as autism) and 6 to 8 years for conditions like ADHD, anxiety, or depression.

How to help your child’s mental health

Supporting your child’s mental well-being starts with simple, everyday actions.

Encouraging open conversations about emotions

Talking about feelings helps children understand and manage their emotions. 

Encourage open discussions by asking simple questions such as, “how are you feeling today?” After they’ve talked about their emotions, you can acknowledge them with phrases such as “it’s okay to feel upset.”

When you create a supportive, non-judgemental space, your children will be encouraged to express themselves, making it easier for you to identify and work through mental health challenges throughout their childhood. This also lays a strong foundation for open discussions around mental well-being as they enter adolescence.

Teaching emotional self-regulation

Emotional regulation helps children navigate challenges without feeling overwhelmed. Parents can support this by modelling healthy ways to manage emotions, such as staying calm during stressful moments or talking openly about feelings. 

Tools like the N Mood Meter can help children recognise and label their emotions, making it easier for them to express how they feel. 

Simple techniques like deep breathing or “animal breaths” and counting to ten, can also help children manage emotions such as frustration, fear, and anger.

Supporting a healthy emotional child at home

Daily habits influence a child’s emotional well-being. A consistent routine with enough sleep, nutritious and balanced meals, and plenty of outdoor play helps reduce stress and improve their mood. 

Creating playful spaces inside the home can also support emotional health. A dedicated area for creative play or quiet time gives children a safe way to explore their emotions, build confidence, and strengthen problem-solving skills.

Limiting screen time and promoting real-life social interactions, like playdates or family time, supports communication skills and helps a young child’s emotional readiness for school.

Resources for parents and caregivers

Plenty of books and websites help explain emotions and childhood mental health in simple, reassuring ways.

Titles like Lion who wanted to love by Giles Andreae Ruby’s Worry by Tom Percival can help young children identify and unpack their feelings. 

Websites such as the BBC’s Tiny Happy People also offer activities for parents and caregivers, such as exploring feelings using dance. 

Children’s Mental Health Awareness Week (May 2025) is a great time to try out activities that promote emotional well-being. You’ll find different online resources that offer tips and ideas during this week.  

Books for understanding childhood mental health

Making Faces by Abrams Appleseed

Heart and the bottle by Oliver Jeffers

Huge bag of worries by Virginia Ironside

I Can Do Hard Things: Mindful Affirmations for Kids by Gabi Garcia

In My Heart: A Book of Feelings by Joe Witek

Lion who wanted to love by Giles Andreae

My strong mind: A story about developing mental strength by Niels Van Hove

I am Calm: A First Book of Mindfulness by Priddy Books

Ravi’s Roar by Tom Percival

Ruby’s Worry by Tom Percival

Sitting still like a frog: Mindfulness exercises for kids (and their parents) by Eline Snel

Pom Pom gets the grumps by Sophy Henn

Additional support 

If you need some extra support regarding your children’s mental health, these UK-based organisations can help:

• YoungMinds & NSPCC – advice and a parent helpline.
• Place2Be – guidance and resources for parents to support their children’s well-being.
• NHS & CAMHS – referral to teams of nurses, therapists, psychologists, and psychiatrists.

What are the three most common mental disorders in childhood?

The most common mental health disorders in young children are anxiety disorders, ADHD, and depression.

Anxiety disorders cause excessive fear or worry. A child may struggle with separation, get distressed in new situations, or complain of stomach aches without a clear cause. Sleep problems, nightmares, and social avoidance are also common.

ADHD affects attention, impulse control, and activity levels. A child may be constantly moving, struggle to follow instructions, or interrupt others. They may also act impulsively, like snatching toys or making careless mistakes.

Depression in young children often appears as irritability, mood swings, or loss of interest in play. A once-energetic child may become withdrawn, overly tired, or uninterested in activities. Other indicators are changes in sleep, appetite, frequent meltdowns, and a lack of confidence.

When to intervene

Young children may not have the words to express how they’re feeling, so their emotions often show up in the way they behave. 

If signs of anxiety, ADHD, or depression persist and impact daily life, early support through therapy, parenting strategies, or adjustments at the nursery can help them feel safe, happy, and understood.

Signs of mental health issues in children

Children express their emotions in different ways. Here are some common signs that might indicate a mental health issue: 

• Behavioural signs: Unusual eating habits, aggression, restlessness, or suddenly becoming very withdrawn.
• Emotional signs: Constant worry, intense fear of new situations, severe mood swings, or persistent sadness. 
• Social signs: Difficulty making friends, avoiding group play, or struggling to express their feelings.

What’s normal versus what is a concern?

It’s completely normal for young children to have big emotions – whether they struggle with sharing or feel nervous in new situations. But when these challenges don’t improve over time, happen too often, or get in the way of daily life, you may need to intervene. 

Here are some examples 

• It’s normal if your child gets upset when you leave but calms down after a few minutes.

It can be a concern if they have intense separation anxiety that doesn’t improve and makes drop-offs a daily battle.

• It’s normal if they throw the occasional tantrum when they don’t get their way.

It can be a concern if they have frequent, intense meltdowns that last a long time and seem impossible to calm down.

• It’s normal if they’re a little shy when meeting new children.

It can be a concern if they’re highly distressed in social interactions and are reluctant to play with others. 

Trust your instincts

If something feels off, it’s always okay to ask for a second opinion. Here are some red flags that might mean a child needs support from a doctor, therapist, or specialist:

• Their emotions seem overwhelming and don’t improve with time or reassurance.
• They react in extreme ways to everyday situations, like getting unusually upset over small changes.
• Their play, speech, or social skills suddenly take a step backwards.
• They avoid interacting with other children or struggle to connect with familiar adults.

How parents affect children’s mental health

Children are incredibly observant and can easily pick up on their parents’ emotions. If a parent is often stressed, anxious, or emotionally distant, a child may sense this and feel unsettled. When parents are calm, responsive, and emotionally present, children feel safer and more secure.

Experts have found that early relationships play a huge role in a child’s emotional well-being. Attachment theory shows that when children feel safe and connected to their parents, they’re more confident exploring the world. On the other hand, if a child’s needs are often ignored or met unpredictably, they may struggle with anxiety or have a harder time managing emotions.

Leading by example

Children learn how to manage their emotions by watching how their parents handle theirs. If they see a parent pausing to take deep breaths when frustrated or talking about their feelings instead of bottling them up, they’re more likely to do the same. 

Small moments, like showing patience in stressful situations or apologising after snapping, teach children valuable emotional skills.

What to avoid

Some habits can unintentionally add stress to a child’s life. Try to avoid:

• Dismissing emotions: Saying things like “You’re fine” or “Stop crying” can make children feel like their feelings don’t matter. It is important to label the emotion, acknowledge it, and help children to come up with solutions as to what they need next time they feel that intense emotion.
• Setting unrealistic expectations: Pushing children too hard to behave perfectly or reach milestones too quickly can make them feel stressed and worried.
• Creating a stressful home environment: Constant arguments, strong discipline, or noisy and messy home environments can make children feel unsafe, impacting their emotional development.

Conclusion

Parents don’t have to have all the answers when it comes to children’s mental health. But, small steps like listening to their emotions, encouraging self-regulation, and creating a positive home environment can give children the support they need. 

In some cases, more serious childhood mental health challenges can persist, and it’s equally important for parents to know when to seek professional health. 

You can find more information about mental health support for children on the NHS website. 

Each local area also has a CAMHS service, which your child can usually be referred to by your GP. Self-referrals may also be accepted. 

Remember, you don’t have to do it all perfectly. What matters most is that you’re taking action to support your child’s mental well-being.

At N, we understand how important it is to nurture young minds, and our UK nurseries offer a supportive environment where children can learn and grow despite any mental health challenges they’re facing. Together, we’ll build a future of resilient, confident, and thriving children.