Social development in childhood: Importance & key influences

Social development is all about how children learn to interact with others and understand their emotions. It’s closely connected to emotional development, which is how they express and manage their feelings.

Understanding how social development shapes early childhood helps you better support your child from their first gestures and sounds to forming friendships at school. Each stage builds the foundation for how they learn, build relationships, and grow.

The experiences they have now will shape how they engage with others as they get older. Your decisions, such as how you choose to interact with them, the state of your home environment, or the nursery you send them to, will make a big difference throughout their childhood and even the rest of their lives.

Why social development matters 

Here’s how healthy development helps your child:

• Improves well-being: Healthy social development and positive interactions with others are important for children’s mental health. When your child can form relationships and express themselves, they’ll have a better outlook on the world, lowering potential stress and anxiety.
• Helps develop language skills: Language skills start when children make facial expressions, gestures, and sounds and are responded to by an adult. Through these early interactions, they learn to understand the language and emotions of others.

If social development is delayed or stunted, children may struggle with verbal communication and non-verbal cues, making it harder for them to connect with others and express their own needs.

• Increases confidence: Socialising helps build confidence and self-esteem. Children who develop strong social skills are more prepared and eager to engage in social situations as they grow older. This confidence will spill into other areas of their lives, making them more willing to try new things.
• Prepares for school: Socially developed children can begin to understand social etiquette, learn appropriate behaviour, and be more willing to follow the rules. 

These skills help them thrive in classroom settings, build relationships, and enjoy their learning experiences. For more information, here’s an article on emotional readiness for school.

Key social development stages in early childhood

As children grow from a few months old to five years old, they go through stages of play where they transition from being mainly solitary to cooperative.

Similarly, there are social development stages. When you notice your child changing how they play, you can also expect them to shift how they perceive others and begin to participate in social interactions.

These stages can vary, but generally, there are key milestones children are expected to meet as they age.

• Under 2: Children are learning how to trust someone, and a parent’s or caregiver’s role is key. This is a stage of attachment theory, where children begin to realise that their actions influence the behaviour of those caring for them.

Make eye contact with your baby, talk to them, and give them the space to respond and vocalise.

• Ages 2 – 3: During this stage, toddlers start to gain more independence and confidence. They begin to understand the presence of others and engage in play with their peers.

This is a great time to teach them about how their words matter and how they can communicate kindly.

• Ages 3 – 4: Children begin to express a full range of emotions and can put words to some of them, such as distress or anger. 

They also express their feelings through pretend play and show verbal and physical affection. They should be able to share without being prompted, wait their turn in games, show concern for others, and comfort a crying peer.

At this age, acknowledge and praise your child when they express emotions. You can also encourage them to think about others’ feelings. If someone is upset, ask your child how they think the other person feels and what they can do to help.

• Ages 4 – 5: Children start to develop more advanced social skills, such as giving compliments and apologising when they make mistakes without meaning to. They also become better at resolving small conflicts by negotiating solutions.

Their imaginative play becomes even more creative, and they might mix real-life experiences with make-believe. 

It’s common for children at this age to struggle with distinguishing reality from fantasy, but by the end of age 5, they typically begin to understand the difference more clearly. Help them by gently reminding your child when something isn’t real. 

What influences a child’s social development?

How quickly children hit social milestones and how they grow socially is shaped by a mix of factors, many of which you, as a parent or caregiver, can influence.

Once you get a sense of how the factors come into play, you’ll be in a better position to support your children and help them develop those crucial social skills.

Home environment 

Children first learn about interactions within the home. They observe the relationships between family members and begin to understand how people communicate. 

Their physical space will also either support or limit how children interact with others, play, and learn.

What you can do 

Provide plenty of opportunities for social interactions, like playdates, where your child can practice engaging with others in a relaxed environment.

Create playful spaces for mental well-being to give them an area where they can feel safe expressing themselves and engaging with others. 

Role-playing activities are another great way to practice empathy. You can use toys or pretend scenarios to help children understand different perspectives and emotions.

Try organising playtime with problem-solving activities to promote teamwork, communication, and cooperation in a fun way.

Parent and caregiver attitudes 

The attitudes of parents and caregivers play a big role in children’s social development. Those who are deeply involved in their children’s lives often help them build stronger social skills and reduce behavioural issues.

When others are empathic and supportive, the child can also build the confidence needed to engage in positive social interactions.

Children look to adults for cues on how to navigate the social world, so the more positive and patient interactions they observe, the more likely they are to model that behaviour.

What you can do 

Make sure to consistently model kindness, patience, and respect in your interactions with your child and with others. Children pick up on how adults treat one another, and it can set the tone for how they approach relationships.

Be mindful of how you handle frustrations or disagreements. Show your child that it’s okay to disagree or experience certain emotions as long as they handle them correctly.

It’s also important to celebrate your child’s efforts to engage socially, even if the outcome isn’t perfect. For example, if they attempt to share a toy or greet someone, praise those actions. You’ll help to build their confidence and reinforce the idea that trying, learning, and growing are all great steps, even when things don’t go exactly as planned. 

External Factors 

While parents and caregivers have a lot of control over the home environment and early social interactions, there are also outside factors that can impact a child’s development.

For instance, the COVID-19 pandemic has changed how babies and toddlers interact with the world, and it’s been linked to delays in their social and emotional development.

Studies show that infants born during the pandemic may face some early development challenges. For example, babies born during this time often scored lower in areas like motor skills (rolling over, sitting up) and personal-social skills (making eye contact or responding to caregivers) on the Ages and Stages Questionnaire (ASQ-3) at six months, compared to babies born before the pandemic.

Although differences show how external factors can influence development, the good news is that children are naturally resilient. If a child misses a milestone or seems a bit behind, it doesn’t mean they’ll always struggle. With the proper support and guidance, they can catch up and continue to reach the developmental stages, even if they are a bit behind.

Temperament 

A child’s temperament, which refers to their natural emotional and behavioural tendencies, can influence their interactions with others. 

Some children may naturally be more sociable and outgoing, while others might be more reserved or cautious.

Children with varying temperaments will need to be approached differently to support their social development. 

For example, a more introverted child might need a little extra encouragement to engage with others and take part in group activities. On the other hand, an extroverted child may need guidance on respecting personal boundaries and picking up on social cues, like when to give others space.

What you can do 

Take the time to learn about your child’s unique temperament and understand the impact it has on their social interactions. During this time, you can also encourage them to express and manage their emotions to support their emotional regulation and awareness.

Do they enjoy meeting new people, or do they prefer familiar faces and routines?

Are they quick to make friends, or do they take their time warming up to others?

Are they generally calm and easygoing, or do they tend to get frustrated or upset easily?

Seeing how your child acts in early social interactions will show you their social needs and help you facilitate their development.

Meeting them where they are rather than pushing them too quickly will also help their confidence and comfort in social settings.

Other environments 

As children begin to interact in other environments, they can learn valuable social skills that will shape their future interactions.

For example, when children start attending nursery, they’re introduced to new situations with peers. They’ll learn how to share, cooperate, and resolve conflicts without relying on you to guide them.

What you can do 

Expose your child to a variety of social settings to help them pick up different ways of communicating and relating to others. 

Introduce them to neighbours and family friends, or even take them to local community events. 

They’ll have more chances to interact with different people, which helps them feel comfortable with children or adults of various ages. The more experiences they have, the easier it will be for them to navigate social interactions as they grow.

When choosing a UK nursery, think about how it encourages peer interaction. Look for nurseries that offer plenty of chances for group activities, like collaborative play, team-building games, or structured circle time, which help practice social skills.

Free play is also important as it helps children to build friendships on their own and learn how to navigate social situations independently, so ideally, nurseries should have a good balance. 

Early warning signs of social development challenges

Sometimes, children might face a few challenges when it comes to social development.

Spotting these signs early can help you support your child in building healthy social skills:

• Trouble making friends
• Lack of interest in socialising
• Limited eye contact
• Nonverbal communication
• Extreme emotional responses
• Difficulting understanding social cues

If any of these behaviours persist, consult with a paediatrician, early childhood specialist, or child psychologist for guidance on the best steps to take.

The sooner you notice and address these, the more effective the support for your child can be. 

Choosing a nursery that nurtures social development

In the early years, children spend most of their time either at home or in a nursery. While you have control over their interactions and development at home, the time spent at nursery is out of your hands.

Nurseries should have a team of experienced staff who can guide little ones through social interactions by encouraging good communication and modelling positive behaviour. If a nursery is poorly equipped or lacks trained staff, children may miss out on these valuable learning experiences, which can delay their social development.

At N Family’s nurseries, we prioritise creating an environment that nurtures your child’s social growth. Our experienced staff and carefully designed programs ensure that every child receives the attention needed to develop strong social skills in a positive, engaging setting.